The Evil Pixies in Green Uniforms

It seems like they're everywhere this time of year. They're unfailingly polite, and terribly cute. They station themselves at strategic locations like the entrance to my local grocery store. Armed with a smile, they approach as I make my way inside. "Thin Mint? Samoa? Do-Si-Do? Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?"

Noooooo! They're back again. The emails at work: "My daughter's troop is raising money for summer camp. Can I put you down for 5 boxes this year?" It's only a few dollars, after all. It's for a good cause, right? I'd just be doing my part. I can totally justify buying a box or two, can't I?

It's funny how they always seem to catch me at a weak moment. The timing is a little suspicious to me (likely perfected by clever marketers through the years). They peddle their tasty wares in the winter, when we're hibernating during the cold months and craving comfort food. We've had time to break our New Year's resolutions to eat better, so we don't feel as guilty about eating a few sweets. And there's plenty of time before swimsuit season, when we will suddenly realize the time has arrived for showing off our bodies for all to see - for better or worse.

Now, I don't really believe the Girl Scouts are evil. (And I hasten to add that I know they do lots of good things. Heck, I even put in my time as a Brownie and Girl Scout. Earned a few badges, too.) It's not the messenger I should be upset with, because all they're doing is offering a product; I don't have to partake. It's just that they prey on my weaknesses (sugar and chocolate) when I'm most vulnerable (hungry and tired). But really, who am I kidding? It could be a candy dealer in a dark alley waving a Snickers enticingly in front of me. ("Pssst. Hey lady! Wanna buy some... chocolate?") I would probably succumb no matter who was offering the treats.

At the store, I take a deep breath and brace myself as I approach the doors. I paste a polite smile on my face and briefly make eye contact with the young saleswoman: "No, thank you. No cookies for me today." I turn and walk toward the store, mentally patting myself on the back for resisting temptation. I grab a cart, walk inside... and come face to face with a display of Snickers on sale. Sigh...